Hope a joke about horses, not racehorses, is acceptable.

A travelling salesman was driving through the Irish countryside from one town to another when his car breaks down in the middle of nowhere. Being a travelling salesman, he knows nothing about cars, but opens the bonnet anyway to see if he can see anything obviously wrong.

Well, nothing stands out, but while he’s looking he hears this voice “Check the distributor leads”. He spins around, but all he can see is a grey horse looking over the fence. Thinking he must have mis-heard it, he turns his attention back to the car, and as he mumbles to himself, he once again hears a voice “Check the distributor leads”. Again he turns around and says “Who said that?”, to which the grey horse responds “I did”. He is gobsmacked and exclaims “A talking horse!!” and the horse says “Yeah, to be sure, but check the distributor leads”. The salesman checks the leads and, sure enough, one is loose and he puts it back in place and the car starts up again.

He can’t believe what has just happened, and he can’t wait to tell others about the talking horse, so he drives as fast as he can to the nearest town, where he parks the car and dives into the first pub he sees and orders a pint. When the barman delivers the beer, he tells his story. “You won’t believe what just happened…I’m driving down the highway, I break down, and this grey horse tells me how to fix the car….tells me, talks to me, tells me what to do. I can’t believe it”.

Well, the barman is quite casual, and asks “A grey horse, you say?”. The salesman says “Yes, it was”. The barman queries “About 10 miles down the road, was it, south of here?. The salesman answers “‘Yeah, yeah, that’s right!”.

The barman thinks for a moment, and says “You’re really lucky, then”.

The salesman asks “Why?”.

To which the barman replies, “Well, there’s usually a brown horse there, and he knows f**k all about cars.”

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Here for a good time, not a long time!